Cannes. Oh heaven help us. Cannes. No I never attended, but I am still underwhelmed. Here's the issue - it is boring. Everything is a performative spectacle. And yes, this year we had more Arab "representation" across the board, from juries to winners to attendees to whatever have you which sent the frenzy on turbo mode. And I am still underwhelmed.
OK, I know what you are thinking, if you never attended, never had your ad compete, never won, how come the cynicism? Well, because, and here I go back to the words of the incredible adman Farid Chehab, "before there used to be three categories in Cannes, now everyone goes back with a consolation prize". I am not inventing gunpowder when I say that most ad people are just a bunch of egocentric people, or that there were a lot of entries which never got signed by the client, or that were winners which were literally a copy of previous winners from years past, or many other gripes.
As a full disclosure I have been a juror at the Epica Awards since 2016. The difference is that Epica is only judged by journalists. We don't have a dog in the game, all we want is just to reward the most rewardable ad even if it goes against the grain.
But now my Linkedin is full to the brim with pictures and people on the Croisette, doing all those fancy things linen-clad and espadrilles-wearing people do which included a lot of wine, hey even Tahab Rais published a full essay about what to do when you are a Muslim and non-wine drinker. And all of this makes me sigh. A gigantic echo chamber which is good for the ego, and the tan.
This year there was even a marketing debate between Mark Riston and Byron Sharp which attempted to reinvent the wheel about the basics of marketing. Thank you Quirino Malendrino for setting things right and being the voice of reason (here).
And I still do not think all this is worth it. You got your awards? Good. Did you sell? Did you make life easier for the consumer? Did you improve society? I dare think you did not. I can still be convinced, but I come from a very wary and skeptical mindset.
No matter, at least the whole brouhaha now went down. Of course, Cannes Lions reminds me of a different and quite as famous other Lion. The MGM mascot. Here's the deal, the MGM Lion roar you hear on that very famous opening? Well, that was a tiger's roar dubbed over it. So perhaps this whole Lions thing is just play-pretend after all.